Hello, Beloveds, Kimberly here!!
I love you all so much!!! I feel so grateful for our loving connection. In sanskrit it is called “sangha” or community. We are a community, a family of like minded souls, and we lift each other up and support each other in our healing and remembering of our innate holiness. I appreciate our Teachers of God sangha, and my connection with God and Jesus are stronger because we are together. Thank you.
I have been going through a big transition over the past year with how to “get things done”.
Ego’s idea of getting things done and God’s idea of getting things done are, as I am sure you know, totally opposite.
I am in the midst of a creation process. I am creating an exercise program based on A Course in Miracles. In the past, I have tried to get things done and accomplish things by using to-do lists. I keep the lists on my phone, or in a notebook, or on pieces of paper all over the place! In the past, I would block out periods of time to take care of the to-do list, try to stay on a schedule, and try to check items off of the list.
However, about a year ago, this method stopped working for me.
I couldn’t force myself to do stuff anymore. Forcing myself to do things felt awful!! Like I was chewing on glass!! I had to figure out what to do because the to-do list method didn’t work anymore!!!
Jesus has a section in ACIM called the branching of the roads, where he says basically, you will get to a place in your journey to God where you cannot continue on the path you are on:
When you come to the place where the branch in the road is quite apparent, you cannot go ahead. You must go one way or the other. For now, if you go straight ahead, the way you were going before you came to the branch, you will go nowhere. The whole purpose of coming this far is to decide which branch you will take from here on. The way you came no longer matters. It can no longer serve.
This is exactly how I felt with my to-do list method. It no longer served. I could not keep going in that direction.
Jesus says if I do not decide which branch to take, my only other choice is to simply delay:
No one who reaches this far can make the wrong decision, but he can delay. And there is no part of the journey that seems more hopeless and futile than standing where the road branches and not deciding which way to go.
That is where I stood for a while: at the branching of the roads.
I was scared. My old way had stopped working. How do I move forward in a new way?
What got me to move was that NOT doing something felt horrible!! Just as Jesus says, standing where the road branches and not deciding which way to go felt hopeless and futile.
As I stood at the branching of the roads, I really allowed myself to feel how crappy it feels to be tied to my to-do list. I started calling it “The Tyranny of the To-Do list”! My To-Do list was like the Death Star in Star Wars- scary and dead and made to kill me and other people-just awful!!
The ego mind loves the to-do list.
Ego wants my experience to be broken down into separate items. Ego wants to tell me that my worth and value and effectiveness come from getting things done and checking things off on the list. Ego says things like:
If you are a good girl then you will take care of the things on the list, and you cannot have ice cream until you have checked things off the list.
I realized from the way I was feeling that as I was writing things on the list I was channeling death.
There is only the past on the list. Ego is the past. Ego is death. Ego is never present- it is always some reference to the past.
There is no creativity in the ego, no life in ego. ONLY GOD IS LIFE. Ego is death. That is why the to-do list reminds me of the Star Wars Death Star. When I looked at my to do list, I got nothing- no joy, no warmth, no nothing!!! Barren.
What is good about that realization is that it meant that I was finally seeing that there is no life there. I am interested in being where life is, where God is!
I reached the branching of the roads-the intersection of “walk” and “don’t walk”-and I was trying to make my old way of doing things work. I do not want to do things by forcing myself anymore. I enjoy feeling good. I love the feeling of love. I love the feeling of life. In fact, I am addicted to the feelings of Love and Life. I have cultivated an insatiable appetite for the taste called “God”. And what I have experienced is that once you are bitten by the God bug, nothing else satisfies.
Jesus says that we are all going to decide which branch of the road we will take from here on. None of us will delay forever.
The branch of the road opening before me is to be in direct moment to moment communication with Jesus, Holy Spirit and God. To live my life as prayer. Deciding to to take a branch of the road is the elevation of my level of consciousness: instead of scrambling around on the surface of the death star I am realizing that I am limitless. I am accomplishing God’s plan simply by using my mind, not running around.
I am God’s. Every breath I take, every time my eyes blink, everything I do and everything I am is God’s, so I can calm down!!!
That is the number one miracle of deciding on the branch of the road-I can calm down and enjoy the process, and enjoy the sights and the sounds because I am on tour, and there is not one bad gig when you are part of Jesus’s band. It is all good!!!
I will finish this article with a paragraph from The Song of Prayer, in which Jesus describes exactly how to overcome the tyranny of the to do list and demolish the Death Star:
The secret of true prayer is to forget the things you think you need. To ask for the specific is much the same as to look on sin and then forgive it. Also in the same way, in prayer you overlook your specific needs as you see them, and let them go into God’s Hands. There they become your gifts to Him, for they tell Him that you would have no gods before Him; no Love but His. What could His answer be but your remembrance of Him? Can this be traded for a bit of trifling advice about a problem of an instant’s duration? God answers only for eternity. But still all little answers are contained in this.
When I read this paragraph, I hear Jesus saying:
Burn the to do list! Forget about what you think you are supposed to accomplish! Put all of that stuff in God’s hands.
All of the tyranny and the death become our gifts to God because we are saying that we would rather have God’s Love than the momentary satisfaction of checking some bullshit off of a list!! And guess what? Not only do we receive the only real gift, which is the peace, the ease, and the joy of God’s Love, but Jesus says all of the little stuff, everything on the list, gets done by God, first class, and in style!
This is the Jesus, Holy Spirit, God SLAM DUNK! That’s right!! That’s our team!!
Thank you, Beloveds, for letting me share!!
I would love to hear about your experiences!!
Question: Have you reached the branching of the road in some area(s) of your life? Are you in “delay” in some areas(s)? Are you a to do list person? How is it working for you? You can leave a comment by clicking here.
Let’s hear your stories from “the road”!!!
I love you, my Teachers of God Sangha!!!